"27/06/11

So, this is the beginning of my proper human life. As of the end of (hopefully) my last ever exam at 11.15 this morning. It didn't go so well, but nevermind. I don't want to be a physisist anyway. I also started volunteering at Oxfam..."

One year ago today man. In the diary I started to stop myself doing fuck all. I've been a proper human being for one whole year. I've been feeling pretty fucking down about it too. All I've done is quadruple the days I work in a bookshop. All I've done is a few days here & there in other careers (art teaching, at the Guardian, meeting with a local stylist) that I now realise I do not want to do. Yeah, I'm pretty clear about what I don't want to do. 

Everyone tells me to chill out "It'll fall into place" but you know, it won't. I'll be like 30 still living at home & working at the same bookshop. Bitter & pissed. With all these people telling me how I should go off & do something amazing. Even my boss tells me I shouldn't work there. That I should find something better. But everyone thinks they're better than that right? Maybe I'm not. Maybe I am destined to work in a bookshop & I found my calling at 16 & everyone should just shut up about it.

Except that just doesn't sit right. One more year & all the people my age will have degrees &  I have to have done something. Sorry. Self indulgent post. I'll get over it again & carry on.

Oh wow outfit post, almost back to normal! I'm a sucker for a good print. & when this H&M dress turned out to be 100% cotton as well ("I think you found the only natural fibre in this whole shop" my friends comment) I couldn't resist. It's actually turned out to be one of those awesome dresses that's super easy to wear but looks good still. The top of it is a really nice shape as well which is unusual, even though I've covered it with my jumper because I thought it was colder than it was. Summer's back!

Tying my jumpers at the front has become sort of a thing, because I've never found a good cropped jumper that went well over dresses. The only problem is though, that you walk around all day with this like growth coming out of your abdomen. You get a better silhouette and gain a disease like abysses. Awesome. I can't think of a subtler way to do it though...

I'm just about to e-mail people who said they were interested in the book swap idea. If you are as well drop me an e-mail at: neonpeg@gmail.com. 

White coats. A strange obsession for the month of June. It feels like we've had our summer though. It all started with Zara's range of white coats. The Chanel esque broderie anglaise/lace one with the pointless studded collar that made it not worth £100+, the fabric one etc etc. Then I saw the above picture of Elisabeth Olsen on Olsens Anonymous (I don't know if that's embarrassing, but the fact that their money is endless & they buy clothes I want & put them together in insane ways makes me keep going back). 

Basically the world stopped & when I clicked the link to the Philosophy Di Alberta Ferretti original (just to see, just to see how much, just to see) but the link didn't work I almost cried. That is sad as fuck but I don't care. I couldn't even have bought it but I just wanted to know it was possible to click a button & have it arrive in my life. Just to know it could've been that easy (minus the funds obviously). But it didn't work. & neither did a quick google. So fuck it, the dreams over, I'm heading to eBay instead.

Hello!

How the hell are you? THREE WEEKS! I don't even have any proper excuses. I haven't been busier than usual, I've just been sort of...absent. Mentally & blogally. Been going through that "What the fuck am I doing with my life?" circle but sort of deeper than usual & the fact that time keeps continuing isn't a great help. I need that stop watch thing from that kids tv programme really. Or to quit my job without that having any consequences. Neither of which are possible. But I have finally made myself take some photos & think about posts. Because I still enjoy doing this! Getting comments & e-mails from lovely people who like the blog helps a lot & I promise if it ever got to the point where it was forced I would stop. Pinky swear.

Phew. Well minus learning how to make video gifs I have been solidly reading just non-fiction for about 2 months now. With a slight deviation in the form of The Unbearable Lightness of Being when I was in Greece. & it's making me feel like proper clever. My primary school teacher would have been so proud, they always complained at parents evening how I only read fiction. Although I'm sure drugs, feminism & fucked up famous people probably wasn't what she had in mind. 

But honestly guys this contains like 4 of the best books (I only just started Just Kids when Girls to the Front arrived & I got distracted, & the Isabella Blow biog wasn't my favourite) I've ever read in my entire life. Bitch is probably the hardest to read just because it's so dense but the others are extremely accessible & not dry at all. So I was thinking, does anyone want to do book swaps? Either we exchange lists of books we've read or would like to read & then pick one & post to each other, returning when we're done. Or we just pick the best book we've read recently & post that instead (checking that the other person hasn't already read it). The second one appeals to me more because it would push people out of their comfort zones more. I think postage would be about 2-3 2nd class stamps each way.

 Who's in?