mother's day and new york

Once on Mother's Day me and my sister (or was it just me?) sang Mama by the Spice Girls to my mum. Nowadays though I think the Kanye West one would fit much nicer. In fact another nod to my sister, we went to see Kanye West together just after his mum had died he did this song stripped back, spotlight on him and there was no one left without tears in their eyes. I've been listening to a lot of early Kanye recently. Like remember how he was always so political? & yet people were surprised when he said all that stuff about black people in New Orleans. & that people don't know that his whole jaw has been reconstructed & is made of wire, when like his whole first album was about that is kind of weird to me. He's also an amazing artist, he dresses impeccably & shit I mean, sometimes his lyrics are just insane. Anywho, back to mum. Happy Mother's Day!

I'm off to New York for my 21st Birthday tomorrow, because you know, it seems fitting to be in America when I turn their legal drinking age. It's gonna be a different holiday than I expected but I really can't wait to explore & we're staying in Brooklyn so hopefully I can just pretend I live there for 10 days. I'm not timing any posts because I figure you guys are used to me disappearing & sticking up some half hearted shit seems against the point. I might be a-tumbling though since we're meant to have wifi... So yes, I'll come back with lots of photos & stories & hopefully some perspective (too much to ask? definitely).

See ya!

Stuff I've been doing. Wearing tactile clothing, velvet leggings & cashmere. The best thing about winter. Painting christmas trees on my nails, inspiration found here. How cute are these? & so easy to do with some strips of sellotape. Awesome. Now I just have to go to work tomorrow & it'll all be chipped to fuck. Oh well. Watching Reggie Watts videos. At first it was mainly just being captivated by his appearance but the accents, the fucking beats and the songs are astounding. Like this guy can sing. & he's funny as hell.

Last couple of weeks have been strange interspersed with lovely. Just weird friend and work stuff then lovely Christmas things. That sounds cryptic but it's more that there's no point bitching about people none of you have heard of all over the internet now is there? I've been thinking about doing sort of "introduction" posts on what I believe on certain subjects & then hopefully from there start writing more about those kind of things & getting a discussion going. In between all the lovely new clothes I have to show you, because I'm rubbish. Like I didn't even post my halloween clothes! I suck. Anyway. Day off love.

Just a quick before work post to say, have you seen Solange's (baby Bayonce Knowles) new video? The clothes are perfect, the settings perfect, the songs pretty perfect & man can she dance. A nice picker upper for your Friday morning. Here's what she said about filming the video:

"When Melina and I decided to film 'Losing You' in South Africa, we really didn't have a real film concept in place. It was sort of a grab a camera and let's go moment. I knew I wanted to capture a couple things: the vibe of our friendship and all of the crazy escapades we've gotten ourselves into all over the world, and the abstract and elegant Le Sape Society (Society for the Advancement of People of Elegance) formed in the Congo which was documented by Caniele Tamagni in his Gentleman of Bacongo book. We called Daniele to guide us, and some of my friends from New York came down to Cape Town and we all had a very damn good time."

Can't wait for the album!

"Hello Daddy, hello Mum,

I'm your ch ch ch ch ch cherry bomb.

Hello world I'm your wild girl,

I'm your ch ch ch ch ch cherry bomb."

Sorry I couldn't resist a bit of Runaways. I actually finally got round to watching the film a couple of weeks ago, I wasn't sure about it. I think it was good if you didn't know about the band before, but having discovered them a couple of years back & read Cherie Currie's Neon Angel I think it was a pretty glossy portrayal. 

Anywho... I never really understood Esprit as a shop. It used to be limited to the rest of Europe & then one appeared in Cabot Circus in Bristol. It's always empty & I don't really know anyone who shops there, but they can afford to hire Gisele & Erin Wasson? I always thought it must be drug money. Turns out they're actually part of the La Redoute family so I guess the money's spread about. However, I'll go anywhere for a good print & when looking up for a cover up before I went to France in August I spotted this in the sale. Silk & cotton? Perfect. Not sure about the mandarin collar which makes it harder to wear, but the cherries are worth it!

PLUS I know in my hearts on hearts it's cheesy & bad but FUCK Kreayshawn's new album is awesome. Listening to this song on repeat, getting sideways looks whilst singing along to lyrics about burning/stabbing/shooting stuff. Anyway, listen. Promise it'll never leave your head. In the best of ways.

New t-shirt from my boy now he's back from his travels. I know that Courtney Love will always be questionable when it comes to the Riot Grrrrl movement & parenthood, but I will always love Hole. They're one of the last bands I really loved like a teenager if you know what I mean. I don't get that so much with music nowadays. Like Drake & Frank Ocean I'll listen to on repeat for weeks but I'll never be their fangirl. & plus when I was going mental at the Guardian (that sounds like a top piece of journalism for like Vice or someone, or a really middle class punk band) I locked myself in the stock cupboard & organised lovely clothes whilst soothing myself with Hole on Youtube. Bad times with good music.

Sorry guys (again) I've become a rollercoaster blogger, all on & off. But I've also developed a nocturnal tendency that isn't great for taking photos. So here's one of the lovliest songs in existence accompanied with some naked Natalie Portman. Fun, fun.

Something really exciting & highly unexpected has happened. Anyway, I don't wanna jinx it right now so here's M.I.A's always epic new video. (yeah totally seamless) By the way, what the fuck is she doing with Madonna? Pretending to be a cheerleader? I love how into it Nicki Minaj is & how blank she plays it... The finger guns into middle finger thing on the highly mental Super Bowl has amused me greatly. Oh & you should all watch this. And this. Yes. I have been on youtube.

Rihanna I fucking love you. This video is amazing. & yes it's appropriating culture that doesn't belong to it, & glossing over shit like mad as well as lifting style from Corinne Day; but it's beautiful! The male model guy she's with is beautiful, the clothes she wears are beautiful & the portrayal of love turned to passion turned to hate is fucking beautiful too. Highlights are when she storms off & has to hook her skirt down, lighting 20 cigarettes at once, the Trainspotting drugs sequence, the fake tattooing & her vomiting up ribbons.

Plus I'm in Belfast so it's vaguely appropriate having been filmed on uhr... the same island. I'm here visiting the half of my family I didn't see last weekend. I am a little fam'd out, but at least I won't have to do it for a while afterwards. Anything amazing in Belfast I should do?

We found Dove in a 
soapless place.

Photos from my computer to convey my mixed up head. Sorry for no posts but I've been working like a real person (almost) four days a week.

1. Gillian Zinser is lovely. 2. Lulu DK puts my lame collages to shame. 3. Amber Rose because... you know she's beautiful & Kanye West obviously still isn't over her. 4. Kanye & Jay-Z from THE BEST ALBUM SO FAR THIS YEAR aka Watch the Throne. 5. Couldn't find a nice enough image for "teal" that wasn't a dress from Topshop, have to do with stationary. 6. From tumblr I'm guessing. 7. Yes yes they are a feral underclass, you are the secretary for justice, JUSTICE, as in giving people second chances no matter what they've done & treating them with the respect they deserve. 8. Many of the e-mails I have been getting from job applications or work experience applications I half heartedly filled out, not really knowing whether I wanted to do them or not... 9. Fighting the want to buy a load of fake nails & decorate them beautifully like this girl, or at least go to this exhibition. 10. This blog is so beautiful I could get lost there for days. 11. One of my favorite Beyonce songs & just feels sort of appropriate.

That's all.

Uhr yeah. So someone sent me a link to this video & the song wouldn't leave my head, but more than that were the girls in the video. More specifically, Lil Debbie. So I got my google on & discovered the White Girl Mob & I'm pretty much in awe of them, if that's the right word. Nah, probably not. Basically they just seem like a load of normal, very American, nicely tattooed girls. I'm not totally on board with Kreayshawn's music, but this song... I can't not sing the chorus. & who else would get away with the line, "I've got the swag, it's pumping out my ovaries"? Seriously watch this video. & then look at pretty pictures of Lil Debbie or visit Kreayshawn or V Nasty's blogs. Picture source.

Sweet.

Today I had my last exam. It went pretty horrifically but that's besides the point, I am now officially out of education forever. I have no uni lined up, this is not a gap year, I am now officially a real human being in the real world who has to act accordingly. Now, I've been looking forward to this - as well as being completely fucking scared by it - since basically the moment I went to Manchester's Open Day & discovered the one uni course I maybe, on an off chance wanted to do, didn't exist anymore. Taken as a sign from the universe or whatever I thought fuck it, what's the point in going to uni to do something I don't need to just because I can't think of anything better. I know, I know, you meet loads of people there, it's not about learning blah blah. But I have amazing friends & I intend, in the course of the rest of my life to go on meeting amazing people. I don't know why I need debts, deadlines & 3 years of my life to do that. Uni is great for a lot of people but just not me. I feel homicidal every time I find myself on a campus.

So for now I intend to postpone the huge looming question, "What the fuck do I do now?" At least until September. So I have 3 weeks at home to finish books about Mexican drug cartels, turn my sisters old room into a craft room & listen to the Specials. Then it's off to Berlin & summer holidays until August. Then there's just August... So my internal school-alised clock can begin to panic, but instead of it being about going back to school/college it'll be about what to do with the rest of my life.

Sorted.

The sound of my heart breaking.

Sorry, again. Here's a brief update on my way through:

Wearing: wide legged vintage trousers & bare shoulders last weekend, reveling in the odd looks me & Jay get with him looking all like he's just walked out of a basement rave in the 80s & me like a 1970s socialite throwback. Fun times. Especially since it's cold again now.

Reading: James Frey's new book. Like all his other books it's temporarily knocked my whole world off its axis. Thinking of going to see the monks down in Bedminster for some...closure? One of my ideals is to run off & become a monk, of course that's impossible due to a pesky extra X chromosome, & no I do not want to be a nun. If you haven't read but have heard of Frey, please please do not listen to the bullshit. He could not get away with anything if he couldn't write. & fuck can he write.

Looking: at Johnnys Bird & wishing I was a teenager in the 90s, rather than a child of it.

Singing: Behind the Bunhouse by the Mystery Jets. Because something happened recently & for some reason a more rocky, more punk version of this with the band I am temporarily fronting makes absolute perfect sense to me. Especially after I was non-plussed by their live version. Now I just need to master half singing/screaming "ribs" at the end & we need to get it together.

Watching: That performance by Adele on Jools Holland of Someone Like You. I must've watched it everyday for about three weeks now & I still get goosebumps every time. Reminds me of when bands/musicians used to actually have some feeling when they preformed rather than just turning up & singing their songs. I'm looking at you Alex Turner.

I hope you are wearing/reading/looking/singing/& watching wondrous things & enjoying your holiday if you're on one. Again, again, I'm sorry for rubbish & few between posts & not commenting but you know...sometimes I simply don't have that much to say & too much to do. Next week though hopefully I'll get it together since most of my college work is done & today I'm getting a huge ma-who-sive obstacle out of the way. Ooo...cryptic. Anyway, I look forward to reconnecting!

L.O.V.E

SONG 13: A SONG THAT REMINDS YOU OF A FORMER FRIEND
I Want Your Girlfriend To Be My Girlfriend - Reel Big FishI knew I wanted to use Reel Big Fish for this one but it took me a while to decide on the song. I chose this one because I actually think it's my favorite (apart from She Has A Girlfriend Now) & it also reminds me of another former friend, who once played this vindictively when my boyfriend of the time was there, nice. But really this is for a couple of people who have drifted out of my life. One of them is a guy who was a complete head fuck & the other is a girl who stole dreams from me. I don't particularly want to go into either of them, but my life is better without the negative energy. I'll keep the song though.




SONG 14: A SONG THAT REMINDS YOU OF YOUR BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND
Underneath It All - No DoubtI once did this song at a gig with a band I was temporarily singing with, when he was there & he went all sheepish & embarrassed. It was pretty cheesy, but in my defense he had surprised me by being there. Made all the more as a crystallized memory because the song we did after (I Won't Share You) made him run out & think I was trying to break up with him or something. Needless to say we sorted it out & let's just chalk it up to experience & the effect of my awful singing. This song pretty much sums up my first thoughts on him & the reactions to us.





SONG 15: A SONG THAT YOU LOVE SINGING ALONG TO
A Rush And A Push And The Land That We Stand On Is Ours - The SmithsMany a boring car journey has been made bearable by a mix tape of my favorite Smiths CDs. If you get in my car, you will be forced to sing to something, or listen to me sing something. This is the best because of one horrible drive, with rain & traffic when me & Jesus kept playing this song over & over so I could learn the lyrics for something & we could practice our rolling rrrs. I still haven't quite it down to an art form like Morrisey. How's your rrrrr?





SONG 16: A SONG THAT HAS MADE YOU CRY
Sorry About That - Alkaline TrioThere are a lot of songs that have made me cry, or I remember listening too when I was crying. But this one is probably the best one to share, because I haven't done Alkaline Trio yet & whenever I talk about this song no one seems to have heard about it. I only really love about 4 of their songs but this...it's just so perfect in it's self obsessed misery.



SONG 17: A SONG THAT MAKES YOU WANT TO DANCE
I Just Don't Know What To Do With Myself - White StripesAnother hard one, I was gonna do Wild Thing, but...this is better. I have probably danced to this song about 100+ times, including whilst singing it in the street on our way home. And the White Stripes over any of the other versions because of, well, Miss Moss...



SONG 18: A SONG THAT YOU LOVE BUT RARELY LISTEN TO
He Hit Me - The CrystalsEveryone looks at me weird when I try & explain why I love this song so much. I don't listen to it often because you really have to be in the mood for The Crystals, the mood being kind of unfeminist & screwed over by the male sex. Or just when it strikes. I also heard that this is Amy Winehouse's favorite song so I sort of stopped listening to it then. But I don't advocate domestic violence. I like this over their other songs because sometimes you want someone to tell you just how the fuck they feel. Sometimes so much you could hit them. & no it's not healthy...but I also love Florence's Hit With A Kiss, which maybe more people can relate too. If you overlook all the bullshit & think of being in love & passion & being hurt then it's beautiful. Luckily, I just don't feel like that too much anymore.

READ SONG 1-6 HERE & SONG 7-12 HERE.
All images from weheartit.

Music is my best friend.